Words have consequences

Forgive me for this rant, but I just heard something that made my blood boil. There is a smarmy little comedian named Daniel Tosh. There was a promo for one of his shows where he says something to the effect that adopted children used to be homeless then people adopted them to have sex. Oh, ha ha ha! What a scream! What a joker! For some adopted children, there is so much to deal with. They do not need that kind of nasty joke. I'm not talking about being politically correct, I am talking about being mean on purpose for a laugh. I love to laugh, but I did not find that funny. In fact, his whole act and show is about how stupid other people are.

Some years ago I worked with a woman who commented about a co-worker, "He's too stupid to live." I replied that there were worse things than being stupid and she asked, "What?" I said, "Being mean." And I meant it then as I do now.

I do not like mean spirited comedians. I prefer Craig Ferguson's type of humor because he riffs on his own self. I don't think there is a joke on earth about Lindsay Lohan that I could laugh about. Kicking people who are down, or sad, or broken or pathetic isn't funny. Making fun of people who put themselves above others can be funny, though. Call me a hypocrite, but I think joking about a politician who touts "family values" and then serves his wife divorce papers while she is in the hospital being treated for cancer so he can marry his mistress, makes him fair game.

I have followed the career of Joan Rivers since the 60's when she first appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show. I read her first book and know she is a very intelligent woman. She can be scathingly funny, but these days she is going for the mean laugh and shock value. There are so many good lines she could use, so why does she have to say nasty things about an actress' vagina? Not funny. Just shocking and I really think it demeans her.

Remember Madonna's song Papa Don't Preach? When she was told that young girls emulate her and look up to her and she influenced them, she pooh-poohed it. She could do what she wanted and didn't ask to be a role model. Some people say that Rush Limbaugh is just putting on an act, that he says the things he says just for ratings. But the type of hate he spews is contagious to people who don't think and look up to him. Anne Coulter is a terrible liar. There are consequences of speech. Speeches can bring people to do heroic deeds or commit genocide.

We tell our children that they can do it. When a toddler falls we say upsadaisy! Our words of encouragement mean something. I sometimes commute with a forty-five year old man whose mother always put him down and discouraged him. He is fighting to believe in himself. She never encouraged him or his siblings to try. She only told him he could fail. Her words have consequences, they don't visit or call. My father used to say nasty things about why people ate dried fruit. I have a problem eating those foods although I had them available for my family. He never said anything nasty about dried apricots and I love them.

I want to laugh with delight over cleverness. I want to take a moment to get a silly joke. I want to hear employers address their workers or parents speak to their children with respect. Humor and respect.I want news stations to report the news and stop editorializing. I want politicians to stop bending the truth for their own purpose. (Here's an old joke: Q: How can you tell if a politician is lying? A: If his /her lips are moving. Har de har.) It is late right now, but I hope tomorrow all my words will be those that empower. I hope I can make someone laugh, even if it is just a baby.