60 is not the new 40 or even the new 50

I took one of the online tests that determine one's real age. I don't smoke, have lost some weight, and don't live on beer and martinis. Actually exercising, as opposed to just thinking about it, and eating more veggies had to be factored in too. Guess what? I'm only 48! I sure hope someone tells the heavenly record keepers and that they aren't planning on recouping those years early.

Conversely it seems to me that children these days are in such a hurry to grow up they are losing some years on the lower end. They don't get to loll around much. Stimulate their little minds with Baby Einstein. Six months old and it is time for Mom and Me classes. I am not saying these things are bad; you should see how clever my great niece and nephews are. They blow me away with language and innocence and I wouldn't have it any other way. But I also see little girls wearing high heels and ruining their backs and I am not crazy about twelve year olds wearing "Juicy" across their rear ends. (But that is an essay for another day.)

When I was 48 I went on strike and had the time of my life. Organizing, rallying, spending time on the picket line and helping out wherever I could. Within a few months of returning to work I was fired. I could have fought it, and maybe won, but I was determined to get out of food service before age 50. Banquet serving was golden handcuffs, good wages but no life. At the time I was living on ibuprofen, taking it before, during, and after work. My feet felt at least 75, but boy did I have some muscles! These days the feet are mostly fine, although long walks on marble floors tell me they are the same feet that bothered me at 17 when I first saw a foot doctor or 23 when I cried after a waitressing shift. Within months of leaving banquets I was able to wear normal shoes.

It is twelve years later. I am almost 61 and looking for a job again. I look pretty good, but not 40, maybe a mature 50. No one tells me they can't believe I'm 60. Believe it baby. Yet I have decided not to let the number get me down. Yes there is ageism; you'd better believe there is. And yes the economy is not the best, but people are getting new and better jobs. Granted these are people in their mid thirties. Their determination, research, and networking skills have gotten them interviews and subsequent hires. I am inspired by them. Wish me luck, but send me ideas too. I've got a lot to give and can't consider retiring for at least five more years.

The idea behind this blog was to make fun of the aging process and how ridiculous the whole thing is. Our nostrils get big and earlobes longer. I think my nose is growing. Won't it be funny when all those people with all that work done have long earlobes too? No wonder you never see their ears, the lobes don't lie. Excuse me while I examine my shell-like ears in a mirror. Are they scallop, oyster, or conch?

Onion Jam

Although I like a wide variety of foods, I am fairly conventional. Don't put hot pepper in my chocolate. Jam is for fruit, and leave sweet off any meat. Squash does not belong in soup, or carrots in cake. So it is with delight and surprise that I tried and enjoyed red onion jam on bread at Napa Valley Grille at the Mall of America. Leslie and I did three circuits of the mega mall before repairing to the quiet and classy restaurant on the second floor. Our server brought out our soup and a plate with thinly sliced baguette, olive oil and onion jam. It was sweet, but not overly so, subtle, and delicious. I tasted wine and something deeply mellow, like no onion I had ever eaten. I do like onions when they are cooked but don't care for them raw. I wanted to know how to make it.

From the internet I found several recipes which I share here in the spirit of culinary adventure.

1. Onion Jam from the Mustards Grill Napa Valley Cookbook

Makes about 1 cup

1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

2 cups sliced onions; I have used both yellow and red

2 tablespoons sugar

½ teaspoon soy sauce

1 tablespoons balsamic vinegar

2 tablespoons red wine

2 tablespoons water

Heat the olive oil in a skillet over medium heat. Add the onions and cook for 5 - 8 minutes until tender and translucent. Add the sugar and cook, stirring occasionally, for 15 - 20 minutes, until onions are golden brown. Add the remaining ingredients and cook, stirring often to avoid scorching, for about 20 minutes, until the mixture is thick and jam like.  Taste and adjust for salt, if necessary.  The slower you cook it, the richer the jam will become. Store tightly covered in the refrigerator for up to 2 weeks.

2. Alex Guarnaschelli's Onion Jam

Ingredients

• 1/4 cup vegetable or canola oil
• 4 large red onions, halved, peeled, and cut into thin (1/4-inch) slices
• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 2 cups dry red wine

Gastrique:

• 1/2 cup honey
• 1/2 cup red wine vinegar
• Juice and a few grates of zest from 1 lemon, optional

Directions

In a medium saute pan, heat the oil until it begins to smoke lightly. Add the onions and season with salt and pepper, to taste. Cook until the onions give up their liquid, 3 to 5 minutes, and then add the red wine. Lower the heat and cook the onions until the wine reduces almost completely. Leave on low heat while you prepare the gastrique.

In a separate small pan, heat the honey until it begins to bubble and froth. Cook until the honey turns a light caramel color, an additional 2 to 3 minutes. Add the red wine vinegar, simmer for a few minutes on low heat, and then shut off the heat. Pour the honey mixture over the onions and continue cooking them over low heat until all of the juice is absorbed and the onions are a jam-like consistency, 10 to 15 minutes. If you desire, add lemon juice and zest at this point. Taste for seasoning and transfer to a bowl to cool until ready to serve.

3. Onion Jam from Bon Appetit

Ingredients

• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 2 pounds red onions, halved, thinly sliced
• 8 fresh thyme sprigs
• 4 garlic cloves, pressed
• 1 cup ruby Port
• 1/2 cup dry red wine
• 1/2 cup grenadine
• 1/4 cup balsamic vinegar
• 1/4 cup sugar

Preparation

• Heat oil in heavy medium pot over medium-high heat. Add onions, thyme, and garlic; sauté until onions are slightly softened, about 10 minutes. Add 1 1/4 cups water and all remaining ingredients and bring to boil. Reduce heat to medium and continue to boil gently until onions are soft, liquid is reduced, and mixture thickens to jam consistency, stirring often and adding more water by 1/4 cupfuls to prevent sticking, 30 to 40 minutes. Remove from heat. DO AHEAD Can be made 1 day ahead. Cool slightly. Cover and refrigerate. Before serving, rewarm onion jam just until heated through, stirring frequently.

4. And from Martha Stewart, the easiest looking recipe.

Ingredients

• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 2 red onions, thinly sliced
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1/4 cup red-wine vinegar
• 1/2 cup dry red wine, preferably Syrah or Zinfandel

Directions

1. Place oil in a medium saucepan over medium-low heat. Add onions, and cook until they begin to soften and become translucent, 8 to 10 minutes. Add sugar and continue cooking for 1 minute. Carefully add vinegar and wine. Increase the heat and bring to a boil, and immediately reduce to a simmer. Cook until liquid has evaporated and onions are caramelized, about 3 minutes. Keep warm until ready to serve.

Or you can go to The Napa Valley Grille and enjoy some for yourself without the bother or experimentation.

Unacceptable Answers

There has been a lot of talk that social media, instead of opening people to opposing points of view, actually reinforces ones point of view because we tend to stick with those who agree with us and banish those who do not. Yes, it is true that I like to read posts from those whose philosophy I find in concord with my own. I do not like to feel frustration and anger or anxiety. Those are emotions I experience when someone's worldview seems out of kilter to me. I try not to give them too much energy. Is this new since the internet? No, I don't think so. What is new is seeing just how widespread the views are. Where before we knew our small circle of friends, now we know, on a virtual level, many more who support our view. That makes it all the more upsetting to see how many disagree and how upset they are by us.

Which brings me to the dating site of which I am a member. I filled out a profile and answered as many questions as I wanted. I think I answered something like 525 questions. When checking out a potential date I can see their answers as well as my own if we both answered the same question. There is also a little list that compares you % match, % friend, % enemy. Sometimes I will check out a person whose numbers are high only to find out he has many unacceptable answers.

If he thinks homosexuality is wrong and denies others the right to have children, unacceptable. If he thinks gun rights are more important than voting, unacceptable. If he thinks burning the flag worse than suborning the Constitution, unacceptable. I can accept not reading a lot, or hunting, or even being a member of an activity that bores me to death. But I do find as I grow older, that I don't want to spend time with people that I am going to fight with. I won't change his mind, and he probably won't change mine.

I recently went to a show at the Bryant Lake Bowl Theater. It was one man being many characters in an interview setting. Hard to explain, but he asked for audience participation and couldn't do the act without it. I volunteered (big surprise there) and asked to talk to "Manuel, who knows what women want". He asked what I wanted, and I told him he already knew, didn't he? Poor guy was flummoxed so I said that my mother always said it was just as easy to love a rich man as a poor one, but she didn't say how I could meet one. He told me to join the Republican Party.

Another unacceptable answer.

Anticipation

About this time of year in 1977 I wanted watermelon. We lived in Flagstaff, Arizona and I was having a pregnant hankering for a sweet, juicy slice. I got up in the middle of the night and drove to East Flagstaff to the all night market. Of course there was no watermelon. It was the middle of winter! It wasn't watermelon season. I used to get so jazzed at the sight of the season's first asparagus. Those thin green stalks told me Spring was not too far away. Cherries in June, sweet corn and blueberries by August. Summer fruit in Summer, apples in the fall.

Today watermelon is available all year round, as are asparagus. The multinational food conglomerates in Chile and Argentina are growing and shipping produce to us. Nothing is out of season and we never have to wait. Oh look! Blueberries are two pints for five dollars, better buy two. That is how I come to be snacking on my favorite fruit in January. No waiting for Texas (early) or Michigan (late). I marvel at the huge asparagus available all year long. But when anything is available anytime, is it as good without anticipation?

I am not one of those people who mourn the good old days. As my old man used to say, "These are the good old days." I look at little children playing with their parent's tablets and smart phones as they sit in a shopping cart and think that they will always know wireless and touch screens and whatever else is coming down the pike. Cool. But will they ever know the thrill of that first taste of cold watermelon on a hot, hot day? I hope so.