Celebrate Life

I had a facebook message from someone who attended the funeral of my friend's 19 year old son with me. She asked if I was alright because I didn't seem like myself. Yeah, I don't usually attend tragic events. I realize that this funeral was not a celebration of life. It was a marking of a senseless death, and that is a big difference. When my father-in-law Donald died we had a wonderful ceremony. We cried and we laughed and we celebrated the man we loved. We knew his death was a good thing, that his health had failed and he dreaded becoming a burden. We knew he was at peace, his affairs in order. He went quite quickly, the way we all want to go. It was time.

What do you say about a nineteen year old? He loved to fish and golf. He loved music and sunflower seeds and I can not help thinking he was just a sketch, the Creator had not filled in the lines yet, he was a work in progress that will go no further here on this earth. Now, I only know what I believe and what I know is that I don't know. Maybe he needed the next manifestation to progress to where he needs to go. I don't know. His parents and family are crushed. His friends are confused and his pastor, well, I just don't know what to say about his pastor.

I believe that Jesus was a very great spiritual leader who showed his followers how to experience the Creator within. I think since his death, his followers have taken his words out of context and created something Jesus would not recognize. I can't be a Christian because there is a huge disconnect for me. I just don't get what the Virgin Birth, the Crucifixion and Resurrection have to do with me. I don't see how God sacrificing his only son gives me eternal life. I don't get it. The church talks so much about eternal life, but what about THIS life? What about living the ideals Jesus set forth and preached about, charity and love?

The pastor talked about that friend the boy had in Jesus, who died so he could be reborn with him in heaven. How Jesus was waiting there as his best friend to welcome him. Someone said that the sermon was like Sunday school, maybe it was, I have never been. But what can you say about a teenage boy whose life was a barely written page? How can you comfort the parents and grandparents, siblings? What words of comfort are there? For a Lutheran pastor the words have to be the official church line, Jesus died for our sins and since this boy was baptised, he would have eternal life with his main homie, Jesus, and the crew in heaven. Believe me, this was not a celebration of life. I'm just glad that there was no condemnation for taking his own life.

The songs were of Salvation and I hope that those people who believe the official line have comfort. I pray for the peace that only time can bring for those that loved him. My friend will never be the same. The child's father will mourn quite deeply. This is a sorrow that I can only observe and hope not to deepen. What a damn shame.