Enough is enough

I spent five hours with my parents yesterday. I made sure the old man got dressed, took the old lady out for eggs and then to Urgent Care to have her eye washed. When we got back I took the old man out in a wheelchair and we watched Little League in the park next door. I bought him a Coke and he seemed to enjoy seeing the little boys playing baseball. They really were sweet, age six to eight and they had confident batting poses. It helped that the pitches were all good, generated by a machine. At one point the old man needed to pee. As I wheeled him over to the portable toilets, I stopped by bleachers and asked if there was a compassionate man who could help my dad. It is all in the asking and a very nice man assisted us. There are some things a daughter should not do and helping my dad pee is one of them. He is so unsteady on his feet. He can't deal with the buttons on his pants and I do thank and bless the kind soul who helped.

While we were sitting out he asked why they made him go in earlier. Why can't he stay out on his own for more time. Explaining staffing was the easy part, making him understand that he can't take care of himself is much harder. He waved off the difficulty he had at the Port-a-let. "That? Anyone would have trouble there!" No, Dad, most people can stand on their own. In his mind he can do anything. What kind of care does he need? There is a real disconnect.

I got the call at 12:50 AM, he had fallen, the aide couldn't get him back up, his elbows were bleeding and he called 911. The ambulance was bringing him to Methodist Hospital. I made a decision, enough was enough. I was going to bed and let them deal with him. At five I woke up and made a phone call. Was he admitted? No, they sent him home.

At what point do we make the real decision that enough is enough? That assisted living is no longer meeting his needs and he should be in a full time care facility? He is killing the old lady who is getting very little sleep while running to his beck and call. He is wearing me out. I see another conference in the near future. In the meantime, I think I will go back to bed for awhile. I need some rest before work today. That after church crowd is a tough one.

The sun is shining on my roses and although I am tired, I am not bleak.